Teacher of Kindness

Teacher of Kindness

Sometimes I miss my old life. I was breathless, unaware and new. I was forever looking forward, hopeful. I believed in the power of romantic love…that two people can do anything if they commit to love one another forever. I don’t live there anymore. But...
I Opened Up

I Opened Up

I opened up. And all those things I hid for so long came out, came pouring out. I just kept talking for fear of stopping and not saying it all.  I just kept going.  It was awkward and it was strained, but that’s how freedom starts. There’s pressure, doubt,...
My Weapon of Choice

My Weapon of Choice

Heaven knows I have done it. Since I was eleven years old, I have used food as a weapon. I have hurt myself on purpose with it. For a long time it was a matter of handling my feelings (mostly guilt and shame) by eating and then purging. It was a behaviour I could...
Severed Ties

Severed Ties

There doesn’t have to be anger, resentment or frustration to be done with something. To be over it. To want out. When I heard my divorce was final I felt a weight lifting. An end. A severance. A death. I am not the woman I was four years ago. Not even close. My...
What If We Told the Truth?

What If We Told the Truth?

What is this boundless insecurity that makes us do these awful things? To take an innocent situation and twist it in on itself? Who are we to look past reason straight through to insanity and run with it? Because why? Because we’re hurt? Because someone...
You Were Never Mine

You Were Never Mine

Sometimes it seems I love without limit. I hold the hands of many and hold the breath of many more in my heart. There is a wave of ever-expanding joy when I think of those I love. I smile from the inside out.  This love is real and reflects the truth of the world, I...
The Worst Breakup

The Worst Breakup

The trees lining her front yard were nearly bare. November’s chill had taken hold and here I was again: a mind consumed with work, motherhood, Christmas and trying to get it all right. But as I walked the flagstone path to her door, I attempted to leave...
Choose Again

Choose Again

I lived in the closet for years. (It’s amazing what writing that out does for me- an acknowledgment.) I lived on the other side of it with a secret that was not my own. For over a year, as my whole world was unravelling, I had one person to confide in. One. And...
Soul Mate

Soul Mate

A friend once said to me “My soul mate is whomever is sitting in front of me.” Sounds like a tag line for polygamy…but of course, I know that’s not what he meant. He meant that the term isn’t a romantic one for him. Instead, it describes...
Is She What She Posts She Is?

Is She What She Posts She Is?

A friend of mine is famous. There’s really no way for me to express that without sounding like a douchebag. Whatever. She is. She is famous in an industry that is saturated with false promises and sweeping generalizations. I have other wonderful friends in this...
The Heart’s Three Chambers

The Heart’s Three Chambers

She said, “My heart has three chambers: one for hurt, one for hope and the other for love.” Perched on the bamboo bar stool, Jen sat proud, yet fragile. It seemed to be me she felt doomed to be misunderstood. I had known her for years, but there was a part...
A Life of Letting Go

A Life of Letting Go

I wonder sometimes if there is such a thing as PTSD of the heart. A sort of post-heartbreak panic. And I wonder if there are little bombs placed randomly throughout my life: A song here, a scent there, exploding without warning. Taking me by surprise. I wonder if...