Who can say why you have these people in your life? The ones who comfort you, challenge you, love you, trigger you. And maybe why isn’t the question to ask. Maybe deep down you feel the perfection of it. Perhaps beneath the ways you try to spin it and make it something palatable to the outside world, there is a knowing so crisp and clean that it’s sometimes hard to look at. The light reflecting blinds you for a moment. You’d have to admit your life is written by a hand wiser and gentler than your own. You’d have to settle into an acceptance that this journey is for learning- for letting go of useless guilt and for embracing the light within you, within us all.
Our parents, our children, our lovers, our friends, the people we meet but once, the ones we work with, the ones who crash into us, the ones who return lost things, the ones who heal us, the ones who hurt us on purpose… They are extensions of us- the dark and the light, swimming and floating in pools of potential. They are sirens for a better way. They pull us into places we alternately love and hate and we so badly want to attribute our feelings to them. We want to hold them close or push them away. We want to credit them with infinite love or blame them for everything wrong.
I write this just as much for me as I write it for you: You will get through.
Beyond every painful thought is a miraculous one. Beyond every feeling of guilt is a memory of innocence. You are woven and held together by Love itself.
When it seems like all is lost, that you will never ever feel good again: stop. Your path is proof to the contrary. Your willingness to see a better way brings you through. And though your body aches, and the seat of your soul is worn- you persist. Your craving for Beauty wins out. Your memory of Light (though fuzzy) steps forward.
To carry on by kneeling, arms wide open.
And all of those people serve the same holy purpose: to help you gently awaken to Yourself. Even when you’re pissed or ecstatic, madly in love or ready to flee. Stop. You can see this differently. Even when it’s hard. You can see them differently.
You can see with Eyes that know. The journey is slow. Trust it. Trust Him.